Melanie Nilles

Okay, I’m not going to hide it under some clever guise. We’re talking about sex in books, particularly science fiction and fantasy. I’ve started reading George R.R. Martin’s A Game of Thrones and am so far unimpressed. Since he uses sex so much (and I can’t say I wasn’t forewarned, but this is just hard on the eyes), and turning me off the book (which at a hundred pages in I still don’t see why so many people like it), the topic is on my mind. Is detailed sex necessary? The answer is “it depends.”

Depends on what? The simple answer is that it depends on whether it adds to the characters involved.

I’ve seen it argued on forums from here to eternity in every way possible for and against sex scenes.

I come in the against category. And my reasons are my own. Take what you will and leave the rest. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. However, I know many readers who skip sex scenes. Many writers don’t write them well. In my not so humble opinion, they are there only for the titillation factor. I don’t need that. I have a husband.

I’ve never enjoyed reading sex scenes, which is partly what has turned me off of authors who have something in every book they write or authors whose stories seem to be simply to show the characters having sex a lot. Sex scenes feel awkward, because it’s an open door into voyeurism that should be closed, and more often than not, they don’t add anything to the characters that can’t be demonstrated in scenes that actually advance the plot. Okay, some people like that, but they probably read erotica anyway. Don’t put it in fantasy and science fiction. I want characterization and plot. Put the sex behind closed doors, please! There are much better ways to show characterization than sex scenes, unless the characters really are focused on sex; but in that case, the story belongs in erotica.

I’m no prude. In fact, I know character are going to look for pleasure. Just don’t describe the act. I like the build up and then close the door or gloss over the act. It should not be there to titillate but to show the involvement of the characters’ emotions. Otherwise it deflates the tension that should have built to that point.

I love a little sexual tension. However, sexual tension does not mean the characters will have sex. It simply gives a tantalizing lure of suspense about how the relationship between the characters will change. Will they or won’t they? And the longer you can keep that going, the more effective it is. The problem is dragging it out too far. A good writer knows when enough is enough and gives their readers the satisfaction of an answer one way or another, usually by bringing the characters together in the end. The catch there is that it doesn’t always mean a happily ever after.

Now, what about rape and torture that might happen to a character? Those may be necessary, but those aren’t the kinds of books I read anyways. Real life is unpleasant enough. Why would I want to read about something that would depress me?

Everyone is entitled to their opinion, but the safe bet with writing sex is to exclude the physical sexual details. If, as a writer, you feel such scenes are necessary, they better be important to the growth of the characters. And then you’d do best to focus on the emotional effects.

Oh, and unless something interesting actually happens by the end of AGOT, I won’t be reading the next in the Song of Ice and Fire series.